Summer Is Supposed to Be Relaxing… So Why Am I So Stressed?

Written by Irene Bearly

The school year just ended, and my kids are bouncing off the walls with endless excitement. But as a work-from-home parent, I already feel defeated. How am I going to juggle my work-life balance with their summer camps, playdates, and random sleep schedules? When am I going to have time to have quiet time with God, spend time with my family, exercise, and keep the house clean when half-finished craft projects are piling up as fast as weeds?

Why Daily Rhythms Matter More Than We Realize

If you’re like me, I live for my daily rhythms. Having a consistent routine of when to work versus let down for the day brings a much-needed sense of peace and stability. I love it during the school year when our family life falls into a predictable cycle of work/school, extracurriculars, church activities, mealtimes, chore times, and sleep times.

For example, despite my family’s night owl tendencies, I still make sure the kids and I go to bed on time during the school year because I know I’ll pay for it the next morning if I don’t. There’s nothing as frustrating as trying to rush a group of sluggish, cranky kiddos out the door so we can reach school before the tardy bell.

When Summer Disrupts Those Rhythms

However, during the summer break (or even holiday season), it seems like all these routines get thrown out the window. Not only is my family’s schedule messed up, but my friends and coworkers are no longer as available as usual. Summer means there’s time to take vacations, visit out-of-state family, and enjoy all those outdoor activities. That also means it can be harder to find time to hang out with your community or get certain work projects done because everyone’s making the most of their PTO hours.

It’s nothing groundbreaking, but disrupting your normal healthy habits naturally leads to a decrease in your physical, emotional, mental, and even spiritual wellbeing. We can easily get caught up in a downward spiral such as:

You stay up too late watching a movie with your kids ➡️ lack of sleep
You woke up too late and have to skip your morning Bible reading ➡️ lack of time with God
The kids keep interrupting you at work/home ➡️ lack of productivity
You’re stressed from home life and need to talk to someone, but your friends are gone on vacation ➡️ lack of social life
So, you stay up too late to cope with the stress ➡️ lack of sleep that starts the cycle again

Obviously, one disruption on its own may not have as much impact, but cumulatively, you may find that stress and overwhelm are increasing while emotional awareness and healthy coping mechanisms are decreasing. Then you look in the mirror one day and wonder why your heart is already racing as soon as you get up in the morning. All the positive results you got from working on New Year’s resolutions or daily disciplines seem to have evaporated into thin air.

📩 Stay Grounded This Summer ⛱️

Get practical, faith-centered insights to help you navigate disrupted routines and the mental load of everyday life.

5 Ways to Stay Emotionally Grounded During the Summer

Weeks before the school year ended, I was already been praying over our family’s summer. This will be the first year where my husband and I are both working from home while our kids are simultaneously off from school without any childcare. I know, crazy. But I’m also excited for the chance to spend more time with my children, to bond with them and pour into them as God has called me to do. So, here’s my simple 5-step action plan to keep our household a little less chaotic and more intentional.

1. Create a Loose Summer Schedule

Instead of planning every hour of the day like I usually do, I’m going to take a step back and only focus on the most important rhythms I want to keep, such as:

Consistent sleep schedule
As I get older, I don’t recover as quickly when I sleep in on the weekends. Therefore, my aim is to wake up at the same time every day, so I have the energy to love God and His people to the best of my ability. (Thanks to Justin Whitmel Earley’s book, The Body Teaches the Soul, for that tip.)
Quiet time first thing in the morning
My daily time with God might have to be a little shorter than usual, but it’s essential for me to get my head on straight with His Word, ask any questions bothering my heart, and prioritize the good works He wants me to accomplish today.

2. Make Summer Resolutions or Goals

We have a tradition of making New Year’s resolutions — why not make some mid-year summer resolutions? Without intentionality, I can imagine wasting away our days with endless house chores or mindless screen time. Instead, I have some fun projects that I want to accomplish with my kids to draw us closer to God and each other.

Work on extracurriculars with my daughter
My daughter is part of a faith-based scout-type troop, so summer is the perfect time to work on interesting badges and service projects that we normally wouldn’t have time for.
Exercise with my son
It’s like killing two birds with one stone — my son is interested in buffing up this summer and I want to stay in shape. Who knows what things he’ll share with me while we’re pumping iron or walking the dog?

3. Avoid All-or-Nothing Thinking

It’s easy to get discouraged whenever my schedule goes awry because of little emergencies that pop up at work or kids that need help tying their shoes for the 13^th time. People often start thinking:

“I can’t keep my normal sleep schedule, so why bother?”
“I missed going to Bible study all last month, so maybe I should drop out.”
“I can’t go to the gym regularly this summer, so I should just forget it.”

What encourages me is that (a) I can always start over with any habit, and (b) I usually see at least some small benefits even when I’m inconsistent, compared to completely quitting. So instead of my usual routine of exercising 30 minutes five times a week, maybe I lower my goal to only 15 minutes a day in the summer. The key is to figure out how to aim for sustainability during the break and not perfection.

4. Check In with Yourself Regularly

I’ll admit, I’m very bad at this, especially when life is super busy or unstructured. I’m not in tune with my feelings enough to realize when stress, anger, or anxiety has been building up so much that I’m about to explode. It usually takes another person, like my husband, to notice the early warning signs and tell me, “Hey, you’ve been a little snappy all week; is everything alright?”

Instead of gritting your teeth and trying to white-knuckle your way through this summer, put a weekly alarm in your phone to remind yourself to do a quick self-check on your emotional health. Ask yourself:

How do I feel emotionally right now? Why?
Am I having trouble sleeping?
Am I losing motivation to do stuff?
What habits help me to feel healthy or happy lately?
Am I withdrawing from people?

5. Stay Connected to Supportive People

If your answers to the above questions seem troubling, don’t forget to rely on others instead of isolating yourself. It’s easy to disconnect from people during the summer because of everyone’s busy schedules, so take the initiative to text, call, or meet up with loved ones who are available. Remember that when someone’s spirit feels discouraged, the Bible calls us to “bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ” (Galatians 6:2). So, draw near to your support group by:

Staying connected with your most trusted relationships
Getting involved in your church or other community
Saying yes to social invites with family and friends
Sharing your struggles instead of staying silent
Getting professional help from a counselor if needed

You Don’t Have to “Start Over” in the Fall

Many people spend the fall trying to regain momentum they lost during the summer. However, just taking a few small, consistent steps can often support your mental, physical, and spiritual health a lot better than abrupt cycles of stopping and restarting.

We’ve seen it even at our counseling practice: People who continue seeing their therapist during the summer — even if it’s less frequently — are able to keep making progress on their mental health goals and get the consistent care they need.

Whether you’re navigating a difficult season or simply trying to build healthier rhythms, you don’t have to do it alone. Our Christian counselors are here to support you as you continue healing, growing, and moving toward greater stability in every season of life.