“Shame dies when stories are told in safe places.”- Ann Voskamp
“The church should be the first place people run to for healing, not the last.” – Kay Warren
Why, in communities so rich in hope, love, and truth, is stigma still allowed to whisper (or shout) that brokenness is somehow a failure of faith?
What if the decision to reach out for help was an act of holy courage and not a sign of “weakness?”
What if we didn’t have to battle silently, behind closed doors, in isolation? What if we could speak openly in spaces that welcomed the expression and exploration of “unpleasant” emotions like doubt, fear, anger, and shame?
And, what if this is what actually leads to greater wholeness and holiness?
Why Does Mental Health Stigma Exist in Christian Communities?
These roots run deep, unfortunately. Originally, in the first century, the term “stigma” meant a mark, tattooing, scarring or burning, which identified to whom slaves or soldiers belonged.
Therapy, counseling, etc has been “marked” over time by destructive narratives and these narratives have been woven into our tradition and theology.
Many of us, as Christians growing up, heard unhelpful messages in response to honest struggle, trauma, loss, grief, and a host of other mental health challenges:
“Pray it away” or “Have you prayed about that?”
“If you just had more faith…”
“God won’t give you more than you can handle.”
These platitudes, which are often a response to the hearer’s own discomfort and inability to sit with pain and suffering, leave the sharer feeling dismissed, hurt, unheard, and lacking validation.
They can reduce the complex emotional pain to a “spiritual test” and imply that the person struggling mentally is spiritually deficient.
How tragic.
But depression is not a lack of gratitude.
Mental illness is not a character flaw.
Anxiety is not distrust in God.
Grief and emotional distress are not signs of “weak” faith.
They are part of what it means to be human in a broken world that is aching for redemption.
The church and leaders in ministry sometimes fear that which is ambiguous, grey, highly contextualized, and feels hard to understand. Mental health can be messy, unpredictable, and obviously tough to control.
In tandem, many of our small circles and communities often prefer tidy testimonies, neat resolutions, and healing that fits into a succinct, alliteration-heavy sermon.
The reality is that life doesn’t always follow the script. Healing is not linear and takes time. The miracle and breakthrough we pray for often looks like God working through some combination of counseling, the power of Scriptural truth reframing our mindsets, medication, and community participation.
Sometimes, resurrection begins with simply being seen and known.
Common Misconceptions About Seeking Help
One of the greatest barriers to mental health support in Christian circles is a silly myth that faith and therapy are mutually exclusive. That seeing a counselor is somehow “less spiritual” than going to a pastor. That taking medication is a “crutch.” That vulnerability is dangerous.
Can we gently challenge those ideas together?
Misconception 1: “Only God can heal me.”
Yes, God is the Good Counselor. He is called the Great Physician. And, He has overtly chosen people to be His hands and feet. Most of us don’t hesitate to go to the doctor for a broken arm. Why not seek a therapist for a fractured narrative or a hurting heart?
Research proves that trauma changes the actual structure of our brains, that pain and dysfunction impacts our immune and nervous systems.
Healing can be holy whether it happens in a sanctuary or a therapist’s office. God has never been limited by location or method!
Misconception 2: “Christians shouldn’t struggle with mental illness.”
Oof. This has to be one of the most shaming and wildest claims I have heard. Have you read your Bible, people? The Word is chock-full of very faithful people, people who the Lord Himself called “Righteous” and “after His own heart” and they battled despair, hopelessness, fear, self-betrayal, intense anger…
Elijah begged God to take his life (1 Kings 19). David wept and cried out in anguish again and again (read the Psalms). Even Jesus, in the garden of Gethsemane, was “sorrowful unto death” (Matthew 26:38). Faith does not immunize us from pain. It gives us the bravery to face it.
Misconception 3: “It is selfish to focus on my mental health.”
Serving others is a central tenet to Christian life. But I cannot pour from an empty cup. I cannot “love my neighbors” without learning to love myself.
Caring for our souls is not self-indulgence- it’s actually really good stewardship. It’s recognizing that your body and mind are temples of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19), worthy of tending and care.
I like to use the term soul-care > self-care to remind me that my life is meant to love and serve and give to those around me, but as I said before, I cannot do that if I have nothing in my tank. Jesus showed us time and time again how to practice “soul-care.”
How Jesus Modeled Emotional Wellbeing
Jesus felt deeply.
He was not stoic.
He wept at Lazarus’ tomb (John 11:35).
He showed anger in the temple (John 2:13–16).
He felt betrayal from people closest to Him.
He “went to the mountain to pray” (Mark 6:46).
Jesus knew what it meant to be lonely. He retreated to quiet places to be refreshed. He knew overwhelming exhaustion and weariness of the body and mind. He asked for help. He expressed His needs. He cried out to His Father in honesty. If Jesus–divinity embodied–was not afraid to feel, why should we be?
Jesus showed us that being fully human includes the full spectrum of emotion. He modeled rhythms of work and rest, balancing connection and solitude, and moving between action and reflection.
He did not rush people past their pain. He sat with them in it. He touched the untouchable. He listened. He restored. In His presence, there was (and is) no shame in being sick, needy, or broken.
He came not for the well, but for the sick (Mark 2:17).
He came not to shame the hurting, but to uplift them!
He came not with clichés and a dismissive pat on the back, but with a hand extended in compassion.
Steps to Normalize Mental Health Conversations in Churches
So what can we do to break the silence and strip the shame from asking for help? How do we begin to create churches where it is safe to say things like:
“I’m really struggling.”
“I need help.”
“I’m honestly not okay.”
Here are a few steps we can take… each one a gentle revolution!
1. Preach about it
In my professional and personal opinion, mental health needs to be addressed more consistently from the pulpit. Sermons that acknowledge depression, anxiety, trauma, and burnout communicate that these struggles are not taboo.
Scripture is full of mental and emotional anguish and messiness–let’s not sanitize it. Let’s give our congregations permission to wrestle and rumble with these difficult experiences.
2. Equip and train pastors and leaders
Pastors are often the first people someone reaches out to when they need help.
Providing them with training in mental health “first aid,” trauma-informed language and care, and referral networks makes a powerful difference.
Men and women in church leadership don’t have to be therapists, but they can be safe bridges to healing.
3. Share stories
Testimonies are transformative. When people courageously share their journey with depression, anxiety, addiction, or recovery, it can dismantle shame.
It tells others: You’re not alone in this!
Stories become sacred echoes of God’s grace.
4. Partner with professionals
Churches can partner with Christian counselors, host support groups, or offer referrals. Some even subsidize therapy for members in need, offering to cover a pre-determined number of sessions (this is something we delight in doing at Cornerstone)!
When we integrate spiritual care and psychological support, we offer a chance at more holistic healing.
5. Encourage lament and authenticity in all of our spaces
Worship should include space for sorrow, not just celebration. Lament communicates trust and connection. The Psalms are filled with cries of confusion, wandering, and grief. Our churches must become houses for both praise and pain.
6. Model vulnerability
Leaders set the tone. When pastors and elders speak honestly about their own mental health journeys (within reason), it sends a powerful message. I encourage you to “Go first” in this, if you are in a position of leadership.
Vulnerability invites vulnerability.
7. Use language that is dignifying and grace-filled, consistently
We must speak gently. Listen without rushing to fix. Offer Scripture as a salve or balm, not a bandage. Remember that being in process does not disqualify someone from being loved.
Steps to Normalize Mental Health Conversations in Churches
Beloved, if you are struggling,
You are not alone.
Your pain is seen by the God who knit you together,
who counts your tears,
who walks with you through the valley.
Do not be ashamed of your story, friends.
Do not believe the false narrative that you must be perfect to be useful.
(Lord knows many of us are still working to overcome this lie).
Healing is not linear, and holiness is not found in hiding.
In this community of sinners and saints,
may we become known, not for our masks,
but for our mercy.
Not for our polished answers,
but for our compassionate presence.
Not for our avoidance of pain,
but for the sacred way we walk and sit with each other.
Mental health matters because you matter. To God.
To me.
To the world that needs your light.
So take a breath.
Take a step forward.
And know this:
Healing is holy.
Asking for help is brave.
You are loved- exactly where you are.
Let the church be not just a hospital for the soul, but sanctuary for the mind,
and a resting place for the weary.
Amen.
Written by Kegan Mosier, M.A., LPC,
Take the Next Step in Your Healing Journey
Talking to someone who understands can make a world of difference. At Cornerstone Christian Counseling, we’re here to walk this path with you with a Christian approach to help you re-anchor your identity in Christ. With the right support, things really can get better.
Find a Christian Therapist
Research shows that the most impactful change in therapy comes when you feel understood by your therapist, with guidance that truly resonates with you. For this reason, we believe it’s crucial you find a therapist you can connect with—someone who truly “gets you.”
If you’re ready to break the stigma and accept the healing support that therapy can provide, our team of therapists can help. Reach out by clicking below.
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